We boarded the redeye flight from San Francisco to Baltimore, MD on Monday evening the week of the planned start for my bike trip back to SF. After months of planning, the anticipation, stress and emotional up and downs, this was the official beginning of what would be my life over the next couple of months. Beltsville Maryland is where Elena’s parents live and would be the starting point for the journey back. Earlier in the evening before the flight, we did our usual activities of cooking dinner, enjoying a glass of wine, and post-dinner walk around the beautiful neighborhood we live in. As I stepped outside of the house, everything I was about to take on became real. I gasped as a sudden pressure appeared to press down on my chest letting me know of the significance of this moment. I was flooded with many thoughts and feelings about the challenges I would be facing, leaving Elena behind, and saying goodbye to my daily life and the habits that come with it. I believe moments like these show the true importance of something, only after we think about it being removed.

The pilot over the intercom announced a smooth flight with significant tailwind that would make the trip “a quick 4:45h flight.” I laughed at the discrepancy between the return leg of this flight. After landing on Tuesday morning, I had two days to get everything ready to depart on time. You don’t really realize the logistical details and involvement until you forget one more thing that should’ve been done. But what is really going through your mind is “am I fully prepared to handle what will come my way?” As it is possible to control all the elements I will be faced with. Sometimes you must take a leap of faith and accept that you don’t have all the answers given you don’t know what questions will be asked of you along the way. I believe life experiences equip you with tools to figure out life as it’s presented to you. The more you live, the more tools have at your disposal; hopefully, this experience would simply add to my tool chest.

Day 1 came very quickly after that. I had decided to leave a day earlier than planned given the amount of rain was on its way. That decision would come back at me a couple days later. The first day was from Beltsville MD to Fredericksburg VA – 89 miles with relatively easy climbing. I was anxious to get on the road as the anticipation was becoming too much. I checked and double, triple and quadruple checked my bags; took out things to only add them back in. I had a frantic energy to me that needed to be released; unfortunately, getting on that bike was the only way.

Every story has some conflict and tension that generally builds the story line. For mine, that tension was the first couple of hours of the morning that would define the rest of the day. My intention was to leave as early as 6:30am, wanting to clear DC and rush hour traffic on both the beginning and end of the ride. As Elena and I sat there with our morning coffee, gazing out at the downpour with a dash of lighting and thunder, it became the first and very early reminder to be ok with the idea of not being in control of all the elements that I’ll be surrounded by on this journey. It was a hard learned lesson during Brynn’s cancer battle that left me with an understanding of life that the macro elements of our existence simply can’t be controlled. That leaves us with the day-to-day choices we make on how we want to live that day. But of course, those choices end up guiding you towards the person you want to become, the relationships you want to form, and the goals you set for yourself.

As the rain finally subsided around 8:45am, I decided to get on the road before the next batch of storm would hit the area in a couple of hours. And with that, I started pedaling toward the unknown that I had carefully planned for several months.

I expected to run into problems along the way, but not at mile 11 where I had my first flat. Without going into too many details, this could’ve been the best thing that happened to me as I discovered the pump I had bought for this trip, but had never used, was simply not going to get me through 4000 miles. After fixing all the issues, including buying a new pump from REI – fortunately, close by - I was back on the saddle, 3 hours behind from when I started and barely reaching DC at high noon. By now, the rain that delayed my start until REI opened had dissipated, leaving me with 97 very humid degrees under a brilliant sunshine. The route to Fredericksburg had two tales to tell. The first half, once I cleared DC, was along the Potomac River on a well-groomed bike path that kept me at a casual pace where I could not exercise my sense of urgency of wanting to make up lost time. I glided along the shaded path from the beautiful trees keeping me relatively cool. The stressless few hours I had along this route would serve me well a few hours later, on the second half of the day.

It is interesting what drew me to this experience was the calmness I tend to get from cycling, but the remaining road to Fredericksburg tested all this narrative I had about what I wanted from being here at this moment. 20 miles of biking along a very busy road with no biking shoulder made me question the decision I had made as the internal voice had choice words for why I was doing this and whether I was even capable of such thing. I couldn’t use this moment to generalize what the future may hold. Not all experiences are meant to be perfect, and the way I saw things, shortly after getting off the stress-ridden “historical Highway 1,” was between the delayed start, mechanical failures, weather shifts and driver madness of the first day, it had only one direction to go... up!

I arrived in Fredericksburg around 6:30pm, unable to see and experience this charming town. I was tired physically, mentally and had choirs to do, including getting dinner. Being on a bike allows you to experience your surroundings at human pace but still giving you the opportunity to cover farther distances than you would be able to on foot. That is the very appeal. But the last thing you want to do after a 90-mile ride is bike over to get dinner.

I woke up the next day at 5am, wanting to get on the road as early as possible, similarly intended the day before. I did not sleep well that night, perhaps adrenaline or the stress of yesterday kept my mind active and wandering. Or it is that decompression you experience the first few days of a vacation, still involved with your daily life back home. I had 96 miles with 5000ft of climbing, heading from Fredericksburg to Charlottesville VA as the plan. I was hoping to arrive in a decent time to relax and explore the city a bit. Fortunately, yesterday’s scorching heat turned into a cool and very pleasant summer morning, as I jumped on the bike path out of Fredericksburg through dense greenery hugging around the town perimeter. Fredericksburg is an active town, and at 7am, the town was busy with cyclist, runners, tennis players, and people walking their dogs. It was my kind of town, and I hope to go back to actual experience it.

Inching away from the city, the cars and homes became sparser, leaving me with my bike and the environment around me. I started connecting with the road more, which I did not get from the day before, and I purposefully did not put on any music or audiobooks as I wanted to be in this moment. With each mile away from the city, I felt the tension and stress I was carrying on my back slowly started getting lighter. The sound of my tire rolling against the pavement, with the birds chirping and crickets cricketing providing the rhythm section that became the playlist I was enthralled by. And in return, I provided plenty of food for mosquitos to feast on. It’s a bartering system out here in nature.

As I became more mesmerized by the experience, the road to Charlottesville started showing its true colors. I am what we call a very rhythmic runner and a cyclist. Perhaps, because it allows me to simply drift away in my thoughts, which can be very good, creatively and intellectually, but at times detrimental mentally and emotionally. I tend to get into my cadence and remain there. And when I think of a 100 mile 5000ft elevation ride, I assume it is going to be similarly to the ones I do back home in California. You climb a few hills at 1000-1500ft elevation and call it a day. You’re always in one state of cycling at any point in time – going up hills for a while, downhill much faster, and add in some lovely straightaways. Out here on the first real day in VA, that expectation was put to rest. The type of riding I was now experiencing was very different than what I typically enjoyed, with what it felt like 97 sharp ups and downs at double digit percentage pitch that denied you from ever getting into such rhythm that I craved. If I wanted to control this part of my life, I would’ve stayed back home and ridden the roads that were comfortable to me.

The road to Charlottesville became known to me as “the extremes.” The ups and downs of the roads were complemented by homes with very opposing views about the current state of affair. One house with a confederate and Trump as Rambo flags was accompanied by an adjacent house with “No place for hatred here” sign, while clearly showing allegiance to a candidate on the other side. I somewhat chuckled and wondered if the families ever reach across the aisle for a Sunday BBQ together from time-to-time. I tend to live in my bubble, accentuated further by the past few years being bound to it. But this is what this ride was about: pushing me outside of my comfort zone, as I once heard that it is where life really begins. Think about it…

Finally at mile 76 of today’s ride, 221 miles after I started biking, I would see my fellow traveler. He was coming towards me from the opposite end, biking east bound, and it appeared not to be having the greatest of times on the ups and downs of today’s ride. I was denied of a moment together, rejecting my acknowledgement as we continued biking towards our respective lives.

Coming into Charlottesville would be a lesson I would relearn many times over about Virginia: there is no settling into a rhythm here; you will be going up and down, even when you’re in a city. I will just have to stay present the entire time. And today’s extreme would be a glimpse of what would come next.

-Troy

Ride Stats (Garmin Files):

3 days ridden
221 miles cycled
9849 ft climbed
1 flat tire
1 bike traveler sighting
Several expletives used liberally
1 big smile

Virginia Part I: it could only go up from here